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Rev. Martha SpongUnited Church of Christ Pastor GET UPDATES FROM Rev. Martha Spong Like 24 Old Husbands' TalesPosted: 08/25/2012 8:19 am React
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Abortion, Todd Akin, Gender and Religion, Legitimate Rape, Patriarchy, Rape, Religion and Sexuality, Crime News#news_entries #ad_sharebox_260x60 img {padding:0px;margin:0px} share this story Submit this storydiggredditstumble
I've been speechless for the past couple of days.
I've been thinking quite a lot about the words Todd Akin used to describe rape. I've been thinking and reading the words of others in their responses to him.
On religious websites, the comments devolve immediately into an argument over a woman's right to choose. I recognize that I know a lot of people, some of them reading this perhaps, who would disagree with my pro-choice position and others who would not share my philosophy that abortion should be safe, legal and rare.
But we get distracted at our peril, because no matter where you stand on abortion, Akin is spouting "Old Husband's Tales" as fact, showing an ignorance about and disdain for women that is appalling.
Women form more than half the population. We are not children. We are equally created human beings. Unfortunately we are also sexually vulnerable.
Men are, too, of course. They can be assaulted and invaded, and it's happened historically and it happens all the time.
But women can be willfully entered and impregnated, an act that has lifelong consequences for the woman and also for a potential child. To suggest that some sort of voodoo hormones will protect women from conception is absurd, so ridiculous that I can't believe I'm having to write it down or think about it.
Old Husbands' Tales are based in a belief that women are unequal to men, that they are in effect property to be used at will. What's a "legitimate" rape? An attack by a stranger on an innocent virgin? It's an Old Husbands' Tale that there can be no rape in marriage, because a man has the right to do what he wants with his wife. It's an Old Husbands' Tale that a woman can run faster with her skirt up than a man with his pants down. (Yes, some people call that a joke.) It's an Old Husbands' Tale that "men have needs," and that takes us down other roads that show a disregard for women as a class. It's an Old Husbands' Tale that women don't even know if they've been raped.
The violent attack of a stranger is a terrible thing. The intentional and non-consensual act of a partner you have trusted is also a terrible thing. Neither one comes with a Magic Diaphragm of Holy Conception Preventing Power.
Some women who are raped by strangers and impregnated carry the children and even raise them.
But I don't need a survey to tell me that more women are impregnated by spouses and partners who did not bother to be sure "the female body," as Akin calls us, was actually willing.
I'm the mother of three, two sons and a daughter. I've been teaching all of them, for years, to practice a Love Ethic where sex is concerned. When the time comes, I said, remember what Jesus wanted from us, to love God and love others as ourselves. Treat others the way you want to be treated. Please. Remember that the other person is also a human being, created by God and loved by God.
I don't hear that from the Christian right. I hear a fear that men will lose the power to put their seed wherever they want it to go. I hear a fear that some people, men and women, will honor women's experience and value them equally. I hear a fear that Old Husbands' Tales will be dismissed for the ignorant prattle they are.
The fear of people who are losing their power is dangerous.
So please, don't let us be distracted by arguments over abortion. The issue is half the human race. The issue is the value of living women. We are being called liars and fools, told we are weak and need everything clarified for us. I'll tell you, if I had that Magic Diaphragm, I would use it like a shield to hold off the violation by words that goes on every day in our public discourse, where people are free to say anything they like and no one has to accept that facts contradict opinion and people believe the loudest voice wins.
My voice is soft, but I am ready to speak now.
I have had my own moments in which trust was broken. I have been violated, but the details matter less than the larger, sadder truth. There are men and some women, too, who will continue to defend hetero-normative patriarchy by any means necessary. They will wrap it in Jesus, or the Trinity, or the American flag. They would wrap it in Zeus if anyone still worshiped him. They will make a mockery of my faith in a loving God and my belief in a nation where freedom and equality matter. They will do their best to break my heart.
I believe their numbers are in decline, but I can also see that they will fight to the end, ruthlessly. We who are gentle must find our strength. We who speak softly must raise our voices. We who know better must give the lie to Old Husbands' Tales.
FOLLOW CRIME Like 38k Get Alerts #ad_bottom_article_text {margin-bottom: 15px} Gender and ReligionReligion and SexualityAbortionTodd Akin Related News On Huffington Post:American Vision, Christian NonProfit, Defends Todd Akin, Accuses GOP Of 'Political Gang Rape' 'Legitimate' Rape: The Religious Roots Of Rep. Todd Akin's Remarks
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View AllFavorites Recency | Popularity charlesrfd2003Proud American who believes in the Bill of Rights 122 Fans 8 hours ago ( 3:55 AM)The Congressman's comments are the dumbest that I have heard in 70 years. The real surprise are those who continue to support his original remarks. Scary!charlesrfd2003: The Congressman's comments are the dumbest that I have heardhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/charlesrfd2003/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180689050.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. Loading comments… HUFFPOST SUPER USERJeff Rosenbury296 Fans 21 hours ago ( 2:24 PM)Akin did not state that women couldn't get pregnant through forcible rape, just that it is less likely than someone in a committed relationship. He was correct. This is because any single sex act has a low chance of conception and people in relationships engage in many individual acts.
I have no idea if Akin thought there were magic rape hormones. If he did he was likely correct though they seem to work to make women slightly more likely to get pregnant (but not by much).
I also don't know what he meant by "legitimate" rape, but I suspect he meant violent rape. Other types of rape do exist, but so do false accusations. The married woman having an affair can be very tempted to cry rape if she gets pregnant. In one study over 40% of police filed rape accusations were later retracted as untrue. I would not call these false accusations "legitimate".Jeff_Rosenbury: Akin did not state that women couldn't get pregnant throughhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Jeff_Rosenbury/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180537112.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation.
Loading comments… ritarig2 Fans 22 hours ago ( 1:50 PM)There is a terrific Op Ed piece in the New York Times today, August 25, entitled:"Men, who needs them?" by Greg Hampikian that should frighten EVERY MAN.ritarig: There is a terrific Op Ed piece in the Newhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/ritarig/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180528320.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation.
Loading comments… MightyYowp72 Fans 10:24 AM on 08/25/2012Speaking as an Old Husband, Old Father and Old Man, I am offended by this column, written by a woman, who puts words in my mouth.In my entire life on this planet, neither me, nor any of my friends, voiced this "shut down" or thise other "old husband" nonsense and I am insulted anyone would stereotypically infer we did.
Some people are iidiiots. Some of those people are men. But not all men are idtiots.
And you are a pastor?
Now every man in the pews knows what you really think of them. If I were a member I would leave immediately becuase who wants a pastor who thinks they can read one's "pig" mind? Mothers, this is what she thinks of your sons.MightyYowp: Speaking as an Old Husband, Old Father and Old Man,http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/MightyYowp/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180476467.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation.
Loading comments… thorrsmanWhy should I define myself by quoting others?472 Fans 10:17 AM on 08/25/2012Have you also been thinking about the vast number of FALSE rape charges brought against men?It is easy to name a few famous cases, like the Duke Lacrosse one. How many less well known cases of false reporting are there?
Get off you high horse and stop using a few poorly chosen words to beat up an entire segment of society that does not goose-step with you.thorrsman: Have you also been thinking about the vast number ofhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/thorrsman/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180474776.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it boomergran4 Fans 12 hours ago (11:24 PM)I would posit that the reason there are "famous" false rape cases is because they are few, making them newsworthy, and committed against men. What do you suppose the ratio of false reports is to the actual numbers of rapes? And when the Duke LaCrosse team was falsely accused, they weren't left with unwanted children to raise.boomergran: I would posit that the reason there are "famous" falsehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/boomergran/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180655610.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation.
Loading comments… been2thereFacts have a liberal bias.855 Fans 11 hours ago (12:14 AM)According to studies, false claims are very rare. But, as a feminist, I consider a false claim to be just as despicable as a rape, and would support equal jail time for the perpetrator.been2there: According to studies, false claims are very rare. But, ashttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/been2there/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180664304.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. Loading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. Loading comments… HUFFPOST SUPER USERKate Perez81 Fans 09:28 AM on 08/25/2012I am of the same mind. They elderly white guys who grew up with absolute privilege are on the run, hence their desperation to return us all to the past. All this offensive, outrageous hating on women and women's reproductive parts is a sign of their rage at no longer feeling that they can control women's reproductive and sexual behavior. God has nothing to do with it.Kate_Perez: I am of the same mind. They elderly white guyshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Kate_Perez/old-husbands-tales_b_1828244_180465470.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. Loading comments… new comment(s) on this entry — Click to refreshLoading comments… FOLLOW US 
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